


Get Me Out Of My Mind

by gracethedisasterace



Category: Repo! The Genetic Opera (2008)
Genre: Angst, Don't Judge Me, F/M, Maybe - Freeform, OC mentions, Sexual Content, based on personal canon, but actually grilo, don't know how that works for relationship tags so just not putting them, dubcon, i think, is the title from a fall out boy song?, listen i saw there were 499 works in the repo tag and i HAD to be number 500, marginally gramber, this is my claim to fame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:02:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27559531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gracethedisasterace/pseuds/gracethedisasterace
Summary: Yeah this is personal canon heavy, hmu at tailandhestify on tumblr if you need clarification, or also just friendship, im good with whatever xD
Kudos: 3





	Get Me Out Of My Mind

Graverobber took a deep breath as he stepped into the alley. This was a mistake, he knew it. He would fucking hate himself, he knew that too. But it didn't matter. What mattered was getting that poor kid out of his mind before he could hurt her anymore.

  


"Hey, Sweet!" he called, banging on the side of a convenient dumpster. "Where the fuck are you?"

  


"Here, Gravesie," she crooned, strutting around a corner and directly into her personal space. Her hand wandered downward as she attached herself to him. "You finally change your mind?"

  


He steadied himself. "Maybe. What would you do if I did?"

  


"This," she smirked, grabbing his hands and positioning them on her breasts. 

  


It was... Bad. He found himself cursing inwardly as he went through the motions of feeling the bitch up. He felt  _ nothing _ . His heart wasn't flipping, his brain wasn't buzzing, breath wasn't quickening. It was just... Boring. Gross. Nothing like—

  


He stopped himself. It wasn't worth thinking about. Of course Amber could never compare to her, not when she was perfect and beautiful and sweet and friendly and everything Amber wasn't. She was warm and soft and human and  _ real _ , she wasn't some plastic and leather creature like the person who was currently grabbing his crotch.

  


"The fuck are you doing, Sweet?"

  


"You, obviously."

  


He tried not to shudder. He grabbed her hands and yanked them away from his pants, instead holding her by the hair and kissing her.

  


He tried, he really did. He tried to think about her body, her lips, her tongue, her hands in a positive way. He tried to take his mind out of it, but it didn't work. Images of the kid kept flashing through his mind, reminding him of what this wasn't. There was no emotion other than vague hatred, no feeling other than vague disgust, no thoughts other than  _ get away get away get away _ .

  


"C'mon, Graves, talk to me," Amber whispered as he regretfully began kissing her neck, unable to take any more of her lips.

  


He did his best not to wince as she pushed him against the wall and hooked a leg around his waist. "What the fuck do you want me to say, bitch?"

  


"Tell me I was right, Graverobber. Tell me you've always wanted me and you're a fucking idiot for not fucking me sooner."

  


It wasn't the same. The kid called him an idiot. But when she said it, it was the sweetest thing he'd ever heard. It made his heart beat faster, because he knew she actually kind of liked him, as a person. When Amber called him that, it was an insult. She wanted him, and she hated him. That was it. And then...

  


God, he hated being Graverobber. He hated hiding himself from the world. He hated never being called by his fucking name, especially in these situations. That hadn't been a worry with the kid. He'd never actually heard someone moan his name before. He wasn't sure he'd ever be able to actually get turned on without his name again, especially if that name wasn't coming from her lips.

"Fuck you, Amber," he groaned against her jaw. "Just... Fuck you."

  


"Fuck me yourself," she smirked as she pulled him down to the ground, arching her back to shove her tits in his face.

  


He suppressed a gag. This wasn't right. It was, in fact, entirely wrong. Her body was artificially firm and smooth. Her surgeons had done a good job making her look younger, but he knew the truth. How could he not? Her hair felt like plastic, her boobs felt like disgusting, fleshy rocks, and her legs felt like a bear trap closing around him.

  


"Come on, Robber, take it off," she crooned, pulling at the hem of his shirt.

  


Only the kid was allowed to call him that. He knew it had been out of anger, but playfully. And even if it was true anger, at least it was  _ her  _ anger. Oh, and the kid had never been  _ like that _ , even when she was undressing him and begging him to do the same. There were no orders, only a lonely girl trying to figure out what she was feeling. He knew what he'd done wasn't right, but at least it didn't feel as purely  _ wrong _ as this.

  


His lips found hers again as he desperately tried to enjoy this. He shut his eyes tightly, divorcing himself from the reality of Amber and turning his thoughts to the kid instead. If he tried, he could almost imagine it was her body under his again. Maybe it was the kid after a few years, or after a few surgeries, but he didn't care. If she was there, if she wanted him again, it would be more than enough for him. It would be everything he'd ever wanted, really.

  


" _ Fuck _ , Shilo, I missed you," he found himself muttering against the girl's lips.

  


It was only at that moment that he remembered the girl was not, in fact, the kid. Amber stared back at him, eyes full of anger. "What the  _ fuck _ did you just say?"

  


He tried not to let his disappointment and damn near heartbreak show. "I just said I don't fucking want you, bitch. You're not her. You never will be."

  


His hands wrapped around her calves—nothing like the way he'd held the kid's legs—and ripped them away from his body. He swatted her hands off of his neck and stood up as quickly as he could, staring down at the mighty heiress in disgust. 

  


"What's the matter, Graverobber?" Amber demanded. "There some lady corpse you'd rather fuck instead? Am I too alive for you?"

  


He shook his head. "The opposite, bitch. You're practically dead. You're pure plastic and surgery and lust, there's nothing really  _ alive _ about you. I tried, okay? I tried to fuck you, but I can't. Even an asshole like me can't stick it in a disgusting whore like you."

  


She scoffed. "You don't deserve me, freak. I never wanted you anyway."

  


He started to protest, but chose instead to mutter a quick "Fuck off, Sweet" before making a quick escape.

  


He took a shuddering breath as he ran to a far away alley and collapsed against the side of a dumpster. What the  _ fuck  _ had he been thinking? Did he really think she'd be able to take his mind off of her? He should have known it was impossible. Yeah, he'd wormed his way into her bed, but the kid had snuck into his heart when he wasn't looking. 

  


God, how could he let that happen? He called her kid for a reason. She was a minor. He had to remember, she was a minor. A  _ child _ . Sure, her body might have been entirely mature and fucking sexy as hell, but that couldn't mean anything, it just couldn't. It was a mistake, and he couldn't let it happen again. Not with her, not with the next pretty girl he saw, not with anyone.

  


He laughed at himself as the tears began to fall. The next pretty girl he saw? He knew better than to even think it. Yeah, he'd seen pretty girls before. He was a man, sometimes girls caught his interest, but no one like Sh— Like the kid. She was different. She talked to him and she liked him, even the stupid cockroach and Shakespeare parts of him. She knew his name, which made her more different than it probably should have.

  


He'd meant what he said earlier. Being called his alias romantically would probably be the same again. She'd spoiled him, being that perfect while also being that sweet. Hearing her scream his name, his  _ real _ name, while he was between her thighs was something he'd never be able to repeat again.

  


Never. Not even with her. Yes, he knew where her house was. Yes, he knew how easy it was to climb into her room and into her bed. Yes, he knew how it felt to feel genuinely  _ loved  _ by the most beautiful girl in the world, but it could never happen again. She was a kid, and he was a drug dealer. Like she'd said, there was only one way that story could end, and he wouldn't let it happen.

  


Shit, he couldn't let it happen. He didn't even want to imagine her ruined by the glow, ruined by  _ him _ . He knew it would break her beautiful fragile body, turning her into some artificial monster like Amber. He knew her sweet, trusting personality would turn into Brenda's lustful cynicism. She would stop being the kid, stop being his little bug, and start being just another scalpel slut.

  


He had to step back. He had to rid his mind of her, for her own good. He'd tried, actually. He'd tried to distance himself, but it fucking failed. And Amber? He’d actually tried to fuck  _ Amber _ ? God, Chris would throttle him for this. 

  


He pawed away the tears with his sleeve. He couldn't sit weeping any longer, he had work to do. He stood up and straightened his coat, slipping back into his true Graverobber persona. He had shit to do, a sister to call, and maybe even a genetic opera to watch. He got the feeling he hadn't seen the last of the kid, and if he knew Rotti, that was where she'd be.

  


_ And wherever she goes, I'll follow. I guess I’ll just try not to be creepy as fuck, but I’ll always follow her. _

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah this is personal canon heavy, hmu at tailandhestify on tumblr if you need clarification, or also just friendship, im good with whatever xD


End file.
